Young men think about sex a median of 18.6 times a day and young women 9.9 times, in a week-long study of 283 US college students aged 18 to 25, 163 of whom logged their sexual thoughts on a tally counter, according to the study’s lead author, Terri Fisher (2012).
That’s nowhere near the famous “every 7 seconds.” Taken literally, the myth means about 8,229 sexual thoughts in 16 waking hours, 442 times the median young man’s count (our calculation).
In this article, we’ll break down how often men and women think about sex, where the 7-second claim falls apart, how sex compares with food and sleep, why men report more sexual thoughts, and how fantasies, age and relationships fit in.
Top Sexual Thought Statistics
- Young men think about sex a median 18.6 times a day and young women 9.9 times, in a week-long clicker study in which 163 of 283 US college students counted sexual thoughts.
- Thinking about sex “every 7 seconds” would mean about 8,229 thoughts in 16 waking hours, 442 times the median young man’s count.
- 54% of US men aged 18 to 59 said they think about sex every day or several times a day in 1992, compared with 19% of women.
- Sex made up 4.6% of 7,827 everyday desires logged by 205 adults in Germany, compared with 28.1% for eating.
- Daily counts ranged from 1 to 388 sexual thoughts among young men, and from 1 to 140 among young women.
- 98% of men and 80% of women in relationships fantasize at least occasionally about someone other than their partner.
- 10.3% of US men and 7.0% of women aged 18 to 50 screen positive for distress over hard-to-control sexual urges.
How Often Do Men Think About Sex?
About 19 times a day, going by the best direct measurement. Young men recorded a median of 18.6 sexual thoughts a day and a mean of 34.2, in a study of 283 Ohio State University students (120 men and 163 women), 163 of whom used a golf tally counter for 7 days to count sexual thoughts, according to Fisher.
Spread over 16 waking hours, the median works out to about one sexual thought every 52 minutes (our calculation). The mean is higher, about 2.1 thoughts per waking hour, because a few very high counters pull it up.
Here’s a breakdown of men’s daily sexual thoughts in the clicker study:
| Measure | Young Men | What It Means |
|---|---|---|
| Median sexual thoughts per day | 18.6 | Half of men recorded fewer, half more |
| Mean sexual thoughts per day | 34.2 | Pulled up by extreme counts |
| Lowest daily count | 1 | Some men barely thought about sex |
| Highest daily count | 388 | About every 2.5 waking minutes |
| Median food thoughts per day | Almost 18 | Close to the sex count |
| Median sleep thoughts per day | Almost 11 | Well below the sex count |
The sample was young, mostly white and mostly heterosexual college students, so it can’t speak for men in their 40s or 60s. Fisher herself wrote that much more research is needed with people older than 25.
National survey data point the same way. 54% of US men aged 18 to 59 said they think about sex “every day or several times a day,” according to the 1992 National Health and Social Life Survey (NHSLS), as reported by The Globe and Mail. The survey covered 3,432 adults, according to the University of Chicago Chronicle. Another 43% said a few times a week or month, and 4% less than once a month.
How Often Do Women Think About Sex?
About 10 times a day. Young women recorded a median of 9.9 sexual thoughts a day and a mean of 18.6, about half the men’s figures, according to Fisher. That’s roughly one sexual thought every 97 waking minutes (our calculation).
Women’s counts also varied widely, from 1 to 140 a day, and no woman reported zero, according to Ohio State University. “For women, that’s a broader range than many people would have expected,” Fisher told HealthDay.
In the 1992 national survey, 19% of women said they think about sex every day or several times a day. Most women (67%) answered a few times a week or month, and 14% less than once a month, as reported by The Globe and Mail.
Here’s a breakdown of how men and women compare:
| Measure | Men | Women | Source |
|---|---|---|---|
| Median sexual thoughts per day (ages 18–25) | 18.6 | 9.9 | Fisher et al. (2012) |
| Mean sexual thoughts per day (ages 18–25) | 34.2 | 18.6 | Fisher et al. (2012) |
| Daily range (ages 18–25) | 1–388 | 1–140 | Fisher et al. (2012) |
| Think about sex daily or more (ages 18–59) | 54% | 19% | NHSLS (1992) |
| A few times a week or month (ages 18–59) | 43% | 67% | NHSLS (1992) |
| Less than once a month (ages 18–59) | 4% | 14% | NHSLS (1992) |
The national figures are often credited to the Kinsey Institute. They come from the NHSLS, a random sample of US adults aged 18 to 59 published by Laumann, Michael and colleagues in 1994, according to a textbook figure from Macmillan Learning.
Do Men Really Think About Sex Every 7 Seconds?
No. A sexual thought every 7 seconds adds up to about 514 an hour and 8,229 over 16 waking hours (our calculation), while the highest count any man logged in the Ohio State study was 388 a day, according to Ohio State University.
Even that record holder fell far short. 388 thoughts in 16 hours is one about every 2.5 minutes, and he logged about 21 times as many as the median man (our calculation).
Nobody knows where the claim started. It is often wrongly pinned on Alfred Kinsey’s reports, but there’s no research behind it, according to Snopes. Counted around the clock, the myth would mean 12,343 thoughts a day, as MEL Magazine worked out.
Here’s how the myth compares with measured figures:
| Claim or Measure | Sexual Thoughts per Day | Source |
|---|---|---|
| “Every 7 seconds,” 24 hours | 12,343 | MEL Magazine (2021) |
| “Every 7 seconds,” 16 waking hours | 8,229 | Our calculation |
| Highest count, one young man | 388 | Fisher et al. (2012) |
| Highest count, one young woman | 140 | Fisher et al. (2012) |
| Mean, young men | 34.2 | Fisher et al. (2012) |
| Median, young men | 18.6 | Fisher et al. (2012) |
| Median, young women | 9.9 | Fisher et al. (2012) |
| Adults in Germany, phone check-ins | About 1 (estimate) | Stafford (2014) on Hofmann et al. (2012) |
Different methods give different answers. When adults in Germany were asked at random moments about desires felt in the past half hour, a sexual desire was reported on about 4% of occasions, which psychologist Tom Stafford reads as about once a day, in his 2014 BBC Future column republished on Mind Hacks. A clicker counts every passing thought, and the act of counting may itself prompt more of them.
Fisher’s recruits also guessed badly. Their own estimates were “all much lower” than the counts they recorded, according to Ohio State University.
Do People Think About Sex More Than Food or Sleep?
Not really. Young men thought about food almost 18 times a day, close to their 18.6 sexual thoughts, while young women thought about food nearly 15 times a day, about 5 more than about sex, according to Ohio State University.
Here’s a breakdown of daily thoughts about sex, food and sleep:
| Thought Type | Young Men (Median per Day) | Young Women (Median per Day) | Men vs Women |
|---|---|---|---|
| Sex | 18.6 | 9.9 | 1.9x |
| Food | Almost 18 | Nearly 15 | 1.2x |
| Sleep | Almost 11 | About 8.5 | 1.3x |
Desire data tell a similar story. Sex made up 4.6% of 7,827 desires reported by 205 adults aged 18 to 55 in Würzburg, Germany, whose phones beeped 7 times a day for a week, while eating made up 28.1%, about 6.1 times as many, according to Hofmann, Baumeister, Förster and Vohs (2012).
Sexual desires were rarer but felt stronger. Desire strength was above average for sleep and sex, and people resisted sexual urges more often than average and were relatively successful at it, according to Hofmann, Vohs and Baumeister (2012).
Source: Hofmann et al. (2012), Journal of Personality and Social Psychology
Why Do Men Think About Sex More Than Women?
Men’s median count of sexual thoughts was about 1.9 times women’s, but men also logged about 1.2 times as many food thoughts and 1.3 times as many sleep thoughts (our calculations based on Ohio State University data). Fisher noted that the study can’t show whether men really had more thoughts of all three kinds than women did, or were just more likely to recognize or record them.
Attitudes predicted thoughts better than gender. Students most comfortable with sexuality (high “erotophilia”) thought about sex more often, and women who cared most about appearing socially acceptable reported fewer sexual thoughts, according to Ohio State University. “You would be better off knowing their degree of erotophilia rather than whether they are male or female,” Fisher wrote in Psychology Today.
Reporting pressure may play a role. In an earlier experiment, college women reported 2.6 sexual partners when they thought answers might be seen, but 4.4 when hooked to a fake lie detector, slightly above men’s 4.0, according to Alexander and Fisher (2003).
Here’s a breakdown of the gender gap across measures:
| Measure | Men | Women | Men vs Women |
|---|---|---|---|
| Masturbated at least weekly, US adults (2021) | 35.9% | 8.8% | 4.1x |
| Think about sex daily or more, US adults 18–59 (1992) | 54% | 19% | 2.8x |
| Rate sex drive above average, US adults 40+ (2022) | 22% | 9% | 2.4x |
| Median sexual thoughts per day, ages 18–25 | 18.6 | 9.9 | 1.9x |
| Screen positive for compulsive sexual behavior, ages 18–50 | 10.3% | 7.0% | 1.5x |
| Median sleep thoughts per day, ages 18–25 | Almost 11 | About 8.5 | 1.3x |
| Median food thoughts per day, ages 18–25 | Almost 18 | Nearly 15 | 1.2x |
Thoughts aren’t the same as behavior. The thought gap is smaller than the gap in weekly masturbation, where 35.9% of US men and 8.8% of women do it at least weekly, as our breakdown of how often people masturbate shows from a 2021 national survey of 3,742 adults.
Partnered sex follows its own pattern. Well-being rises with sex up to about once a week and then levels off in a study of 25,510 Americans, a key finding in the research on how often you should have sex.
How Often Do People Have Sexual Fantasies?
Almost everyone has them: 97% to 98% of people report sexual fantasies in surveys, according to lecture notes on Justin Lehmiller’s research from the Sexual Health Alliance. Lehmiller’s own survey covered 4,175 Americans, as he described in Psychology Today.
Fantasies often stray from the bedroom. 98% of men and 80% of women in heterosexual relationships said they at least occasionally fantasize about someone other than their partner, in a survey of 349 university students and employees by Hicks and Leitenberg, as summarized by Sex and Psychology.
Here’s a breakdown of sexual fantasy statistics:
| Measure | Men | Women | Source |
|---|---|---|---|
| Ever had a sex dream | 93% | 86% | Schredl et al. (2004) |
| In a relationship, fantasize about someone else | 98% | 80% | Hicks & Leitenberg (2001) |
| Share of fantasies about someone other than partner | 54% | 36% | Hicks & Leitenberg (2001) |
| Fantasize during masturbation (share of the time) | 86% | 69% | Unnamed study via The Conversation (2011) |
Men’s and women’s fantasies also differ in content. Men were more likely to have multi-partner fantasies and to have them often, while women were more likely to fantasize often about passion and romance, according to Lehmiller. Our roundup of the most common fetishes and kinks breaks down which fantasy themes people report most.
How Do Age and Marriage Affect Sexual Thoughts?
The gender gap persists in later life. Men aged 45 and older were more than 5 times as likely as women to say they think of sex at least once a day, in AARP’s 2009 survey of 1,670 Americans 45+, as reported by NBC News.
Desire stays uneven too. 22% of men and 9% of women aged 40 and older rate their sex drive as higher than average, and 55% of men vs 36% of women say they don’t have sex often enough, in a 2022 survey of 2,506 adults by AARP.
Here’s a breakdown of sexual thoughts and desire in later life and relationships:
| Measure | Men | Women | Population and Source |
|---|---|---|---|
| Think of sex at least once a day | More than 5x as likely | Reference | US adults 45+, AARP (2009) |
| Rate sex drive above average | 22% | 9% | US adults 40+, AARP (2022) |
| Don’t have sex often enough | 55% | 36% | US adults 40+, AARP (2022) |
| Sexually active | 54% | 31% | England, adults over 70, ELSA (2015) |
Sexual thoughts don’t vanish with age. 21% of 2,381 UK adults over 60 said they think about sex daily and 63% weekly, in a July 2020 poll by online marketplace OnBuy, as reported by Get Surrey.
Long relationships may affect women’s desire more than men’s. In a study of 1,865 German students aged 19 to 32 in steady relationships, sexual activity and satisfaction fell with relationship length for both sexes, but sexual desire declined only in women, according to Klusmann (2002).
There’s no good public data on how often married men or women think about sex specifically. The closest measures are the fantasy and desire figures above.
Is It Normal to Think About Sex All the Time?
There’s no “normal” number: young adults in the Ohio State study logged anywhere from 1 to 388 sexual thoughts a day. Problems are defined by distress and loss of control, not by a count, and 10.3% of US men and 7.0% of women aged 18 to 50 met a screening threshold for that, according to Dickenson et al. (2018).
That’s 8.6% of 2,325 adults in a national sample surveyed in November 2016, who scored 35 or more out of 65 on the Compulsive Sexual Behavior Inventory (CSBI-13). A screening score signals clinically relevant distress or impairment. It isn’t a diagnosis.
Here’s a breakdown of compulsive sexual behavior screening data:
| Group | Screen Positive (CSBI-13 Score 35+) |
|---|---|
| US men aged 18–50 | 10.3% |
| All US adults aged 18–50 | 8.6% |
| US women aged 18–50 | 7.0% |
A formal diagnosis needs more. The WHO’s ICD-11 defines compulsive sexual behaviour disorder as a pattern lasting an extended period (e.g., 6 months or more) that causes marked distress or impairment, and distress that comes only from moral disapproval doesn’t qualify, according to a transcription of the code by Find-A-Code.
Porn is one part of the picture, and estimates of how many people struggle with problematic porn use swing widely depending on the screening tool. If sexual thoughts feel intrusive, upsetting or hard to control, a doctor or a certified sex therapist is a good first step.
Methodology
We reviewed 115 data points from 32 sources. The core data come from Fisher, Moore and Pittenger’s 2012 Journal of Sex Research study of 283 US college students aged 18 to 25 (120 men and 163 women), who counted sexual, food or sleep thoughts with tally counters for 7 days, and from the 1992 National Health and Social Life Survey of 3,432 US adults aged 18 to 59 (Laumann et al., 1994), reported through press and textbook summaries.
Desire figures come from Hofmann and colleagues’ 2012 experience-sampling study of 205 adults in Germany, and fantasy figures from summaries of Justin Lehmiller’s research (including his online survey of 4,175 Americans), Schredl et al. (2004) and Hicks and Leitenberg’s 2001 survey of 349 people in relationships. Later-life figures come from AARP surveys (2009 and 2022) and the English Longitudinal Study of Ageing; the OnBuy figures come from a company poll. Compulsive sexual behavior data come from Dickenson et al.’s 2018 national probability survey.
These sources measure different things: counted thoughts, self-estimated frequency, momentary desires and fantasies, so their numbers aren’t directly comparable. College samples don’t represent older adults. Per-hour figures, the 7-second arithmetic and the men-to-women ratios are our own calculations.
Key Takeaways
Men don’t think about sex every 7 seconds. Young men logged a median of 18.6 sexual thoughts a day and young women 9.9, and the myth’s roughly 8,229 daily thoughts are 442 times the median man’s count.
Men do report more sexual thoughts, with 54% vs 19% saying they think about sex daily in 1992 national data, but men also logged more thoughts about food and sleep, and the spread within each gender (1 to 388 a day for men) dwarfs the average gap between them.
FAQ
How many times a day does a man think about sex?
Young men think about sex a median of 18.6 times a day and a mean of 34.2 times, in a week-long clicker study of US college students aged 18 to 25. That's about one sexual thought every 52 waking minutes.
How many times a day do women think about sex?
Young women think about sex a median of 9.9 times a day, about half as often as young men, in the same Ohio State study. Counts ranged from 1 to 140 a day, and no woman reported zero.
Do men think about sex every 7 seconds?
No. Every 7 seconds would mean about 8,229 thoughts in 16 waking hours. The highest count any man recorded in the Ohio State study was 388 a day, and the myth's origin is unknown.
Do women think about sex as much as men?
Less often on average: 19% of US women vs 54% of men said they think about sex every day or several times a day in 1992. But attitudes toward sex predicted how often students thought about it better than gender did.
Is it normal to think about sex all the time?
Frequent sexual thoughts are common; young adults logged between 1 and 388 a day. About 8.6% of US adults aged 18 to 50 screen positive for distress over hard-to-control sexual urges, and anyone who feels that way can talk to a doctor or therapist.
